Key Takeaways

• While the Serenity Prayer is rooted in faith-based practices, it can be adopted for everyday use in non-religious contexts. 

• The Serenity Prayer can be a powerful tool for dealing with depression, anxiety, addiction, or other mental health challenges.

• Focusing on what we can change allows us to break free from cycles of rumination and powerlessness and find acceptance and peace.

The Serenity Prayer is one of the most ubiquitous lines of wisdom, commonly mentioned in pop culture. Though the prayer is most frequently linked to faith-based practices, it’s also become relevant within addiction recovery and popularized widely by organizations such as Alcoholics Anonymous. Mental health frameworks such as Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT) also rely on the Serenity Prayer.

What Is the Serenity Prayer?

The Serenity Prayer “is a way of challenging our emotional reaction, allowing us to empower ourselves over the things we have control over, and letting go of what we don’t,” says Leah Young, LCPC, Clinical Manager at Pathlight Mood & Anxiety Center. “It helps us to be realistic and not be driven completely by our emotional reactions.” 

The Serenity Prayer

“God, grant me the serenityto accept the things I cannot changethe courage to change the things I canand the wisdom to know the difference.Living one day at a time,enjoying one moment at a time.Accepting hardships as the pathway to peace.Taking, as he did, the sinful world as it is,not as I would have it.Trusting that he will make all things rightif I surrender to His will;that I may be reasonably happy in this life,and supremely happy with Him forever.”

According to David Campbell, DSW, MA, LMFT,Clinical and Program Director at Recover Together Bend, the prayer reminds people that “the only reliable thing we can control is ourselves. This awareness stops [us] from wallowing in suffering,” which can perpetuate problems.

Young explains that the Serenity Prayer has long been used alongside mental health treatments. Given its ability to be applied to a wide variety of circumstances, the prayer can help people facing all sorts of issues, including substance abuse.

What Are the Components of the Prayer?

The three main components of the Serenity Prayer are:

• Serenity: When we accept things as they are, we can find contentment with our circumstances. “Acceptance does not equate to approval,” Young notes. “Instead, it means you don’t have to fight the challenging things—accept them as such and be present in the moment.”

• Courage: “Change takes courage,” Young says. “Most of us don’t love change—it comes with many question marks and unknowns. At that moment, we can’t be certain the changes in front of us will lead to positive things.” Making these changes requires trust in ourselves and the outcome. Though it’s intimidating, it can ultimately bring many positive returns. 

• Wisdom: Dr. Campbell describes this as “the ability to know what can and cannot be controlled, a realization that frees up energy for what can be changed.” For example, we may not be able to change the fact that we’re sick with the flu, but we can change how we think about it, such as seeing it as a time to rest, reflect, and revisit hobbies. This perspective shift can help us stop ruminating on what’s beyond our control and accept what is.  

How 12-Step Programs Came to Adopt It

The Serenity Prayer was written by American theologian Reinhold Niebuhr (1892-1971), who spent most of his career as a professor at Union Theological Seminary in New York City. It’s believed he wrote it around 1932.

Alcoholics Anonymous (AA) adopted the Serenity Prayer in 1941 after an AA member discovered it in The New York Herald Tribune and persuaded then-secretary Ruth Hick to have wallet-sized copies of the prayer printed. The prayer deeply resonated with the printer, who ended up sending Hick 500 free cards. The Serenity Prayer soon became a core element of AA, and is now typically recited at the start and end of each meeting.

Today, other 12-step programs such as Co-Dependents Anonymous (CODA) and Narcotics Anonymous (NA) also incorporate the Serenity Prayer. The prayer “is used in [these] programs as a daily reminder, a moment’s pause in times of stress, as a reminder, and as a means of empowerment,” says Young. 

How To Use It For Mental Health Support

The Serenity Prayer can be a powerful tool in our mental health journeys. Here are a few possible applications beyond 12-step programs.

1. To Deepen Faith

Those who consider themselves spiritual or religious can use the prayer to connect more deeply with their faith.

“The Serenity Prayer can help us free up mental space, take responsibility for our actions, seek wisdom, [and] inspire us to operate differently and more effectively in our lives,” says Young.

2. For Meditation

Eric Reinach of Ads Up Marketing says he uses the Serenity Prayer as a mantra, “specifically for when moments feel overwhelming, or I am struggling to accept a piece of news, setback, or some form of loss.”

He says the prayer helps him speak up when social anxiety flares up, with “‘the courage to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference’ being key in those scenarios.”

3. To Accept Life Circumstances

Certain changes can feel impossible to accept. Rachel Abbassi, creator of the Recovery Daily Podcast, says the prayer has been key in helping her avoid alcohol and cope with stroke-related disability in the fifth year of her sobriety.

“After having to walk away from a career I loved due to my disability, I was faced with a matter of acceptance,” she says. “I leaned heavily on the wisdom gained in sobriety to focus on what I could change and what I couldn’t. I found the courage to fight for my well-being and the acceptance that my life has changed forever.”

4. To Build Trust In Ourselves

So much of recovery—whether it’s from a mental health condition or addiction—involves trusting ourselves, believing we can overcome our challenges.

The Serenity Prayer can remind us of our own power and sphere of control, allowing us to build resilience in the face of obstacles. 

5. To Seek Guidance

The Serenity Prayer can help us seek courage, wisdom, and guidance from a source beyond ourselves, especially when we feel hopeless or powerless. This guidance may come in the form of 12-step programs, therapy, or a mentor.

Dr. Campbell says leaning on the prayer can help us “recognize the boundaries between what [we] can influence and what [we] must release.”

Read the original article on Verywell Mind